Losing a Pet

For many, the loss of a pet can mirror the grief experienced when we lose a close friend or family member.

Losing a companion animal

Many people form bonds with pets or other animals that are as important and fulfilling as any other relationship in life. This also means that when a pet dies, the grief you experience can be immense and overwhelming. Pets and animals bring a lot of joy to our lives and being unconditionally loved by another living creature is a rewarding experience. Not only that, but caring for your pet, such as meal times, regular exercise, and affection, can give your days structure. It can be difficult to restructure your days when your pet is gone. 

Unfortunately, some people might not understand the grief you’re experiencing at the passing of a pet. They might assume you won’t feel too much grief/pain/sadness or, if you do, it will pass very quickly. There may also be times when friends or family, who have been supportive in the past, have an expectation that you should “get over” the death of your pet after a set period of time. The way other people perceive your grief is not always patient or empathetic. You might feel hurt, angry, resentful or withdrawn by their dismissal but remember: there are also people out there who do understand how painful it can be. 

Everyone's experience of grief over a pet is unique, and there is no right or wrong way to mourn. If you want to commemorate your pet, you can do so with our 3D hand-painted pet portraits, hand-painted pet oil paintings, or custom clothing featuring your pet's image, among other memorial items.

You are not alone in your loss

Pet bereavement is often a silent emotional sorrow that can be met with a lack of understanding and sympathy from those around you. You may experience a range of emotions which are difficult to understand and even more difficult to express. Give yourself permission to grieve and recognise that everyone grieves differently.

Studies show that being around loved ones after losing a pet can help bereaved people heal sooner. Unfortunately, you might find some people don’t consider losing a pet to be a legitimate reason to grieve or provide the emotional support you need. Having your grief dismissed can create an additional layer of distress.

Coping with loss at different stages of life

Kids

Losing a pet is often a child’s first experience of death and mortality. It can be a lot to handle for both kids and parents. Remember your child’s emotions may be as complicated as your own. As well as sadness, they may feel confusion about what has happened or anger if their pet was humanely euthanised. They could feel guilty or responsible and focus on times when they weren’t kind to their pet. And at the end of the day, they might feel lonely without the companionship of their pet. 

Try to be honest with your child about what happened. Using a euphemism or telling a lie (like that your pet ran away) can increase your child’s distress and confusion about losing their pet.

Older people

Losing a pet can be devastating no matter what age you are but it can be especially painful for an older person. Pets provide us unconditional love and for older people, who may have suffered from the loss of partners or friends over the years, the relationship formed with a companion animal can be an important and fulfilling one. A devoted pet can create a sense of purpose which can be lacking for those who’re reconfiguring their identity after retirement or big life changes.

Taking care of an animal also creates a daily schedule that can give our days a rhythm. Regular meal times, exercise, and medical care are things we do for our pets that also makes our daily lives better. It can be difficult to find your rhythm again after losing a pet and especially so for older people, who may have less support to cope with the loss. 

Caring for your remaining pets

Studies show that pets can and do mourn the loss of a fellow. If you have other pets, they will need some time to adjust to the loss of their companion. They may become listless or clingy, play less, and have a decreased appetite. Some pets may change their behaviour completely, adjusting to the new dynamic. 

Tips for coping with your pet’s grief are similar to coping with your own: spend time with your pet, shower them with affection, and try to get them out and about more. 

Tips to cope

In the meantime, here are some tips to help you in your time of grief:

• Remember it’s natural to feel the loss of a loved one, animal or human, who played an important part in your life, so allow yourself to be sad and experience the grief.
• Find a way to honor or commemorate the role your pet played in your life. This could be with a 3D hand-painted pet portrait, a hand-painted pet oil painting, a meaningful photo, or custom clothing featuring your pet's image, among other memorial items.
• Stay healthy, exercise, sleep and look after yourself.
• Connect with those who understand your loss. Many communities have pet bereavement support groups so check with your local council.
• Understand the symptoms of grief and loss so you can recognise what you are going through and seek support when needed.
• Remember, everyone’s grief has its own rhythm so be prepared for good days and bad days.